What to do with your body hair this summer

Summer is almost here, and you’re not alone if you’re feeling the pressure to make your body conform to societal ideals of summer beauty. So what should you do with your body hair, from pits to pubes, this summer? Here are some fresh ideas:

1. Grow out your pit hair, braid it and use the braid to slap misogynists in the face.
2. Shave your legs, then let it grow in just a little bit, and use the bristles as sandpaper to erode the patriarchy.
3. Make a mohawk out of your pubes and poke white supremacists in the eye with it.

In conclusion, do whatever the hell you want with your body hair this summer and always. We’ve all got bigger fish to fry.