First of all, CYA stands for “cover your ass” in case you did not know.
Secondly, we want you to live authentically and feel good about the stuff you care about—and what you don’t. That’s why we would never advise you to fake things like orgasms or feelings. But there might be times when you need certain skills that you just haven’t developed yet. This guide is for faking it through those situations so you can enjoy the experience without getting hung up.
Experienced cook. To pull this off, you only have to do one thing well. Find one simple-but-delicious recipe that you can conquer and build everything around that. You can buy the rest of a meal and serve that, or you can do an app and drinks and then have everyone go out to a restaurant. But doing one awesome thing—and plating it like a pro—can make you seem cozy in the kitchen. More help: Con-artist cooking.
Savvy drinker. If you’re 21 and up, here’s how to approach any bar with confidence or order wine with ease. How to order drinks=cocktails. Fake it ‘til you make it=wine. Just stay safe while partying. (BTW, here’s how to do that too.)
Happy camper. A little bit of the right gear will make you more comfortable. Research or ask a friend what you really need—like shoes or an ultralight backpack—and break it in before any big outings. Also, following other people’s lead is a good idea; if they dash off to pee amongst trees, be prepared to do the same. And pitching in will always make you look useful, so help out to fit in. More: 8 ways to fake being outdoorsy.
Confidently cultured. Once again the trick is to find one thing—something that you truly appreciate about art, music, film, philosophy, literature, etc.—and be able to talk about it. Another way to come off savvy is to ask others what they’re into. People will be so happy/flattered to share their opinion, they will find you extra charming.
Lover of babies. In this case, you don’t have to fake anything. Just be honest. If you’re seriously awkward around babies, it’s okay to tell new parents that you don’t want to hold theirs. Saying, “I would, but I’m too afraid to drop him—I’m so clumsy with babies,” will typically keep them from asking you again. More: 25 signs you’re not really a baby person.
Awesome with animals. If someone can tell you don’t like their beloved pet, that could be a deal breaker. As long as you’re not allergic, just be cool. Acknowledge the pet with a hello. Maybe one little pat on the head. If it’s all over you and you can’t stand it, slip off to the bathroom to get a break or suggest going out.
Glamorous globetrotter. If you’re in a conversation and everyone is comparing where they’ve been, but you have not really travelled yet, a little enthusiasm towards their destinations will keep you engaged. Ask questions and share where you want to go, and they’ll think of you as a fellow traveller.
Sex bomb. We truly believe that willingness, confidence, and some mighty fine birth control are all you need to be sexy in bed. For real. But if you’re nervous about your mojo, here’s more help: 10 little sexual self-esteem boosters and how to find your sexual confidence.
We think you can do anything,
P.S. If you’re on the patch or considering it, here’s some news you need to know.