7 ways to seduce your partner, inspired by weird stuff cats do


Whether you’re a cat person or not (and we think everyone is just one cuddle away from being a cat person), you have to admit that they’ve got a lot figured out. They sleep most of the day, bask in the sun, and do absolutely no work. So in the spirit of learning from the best, here are seven ideas for seducing your partner using moves patented by cats.

1. The one leg straight up in the air

Did you ever consider rolling around on the floor to try to get your partner’s attention? Think of it like a sexy little dance. Ending the number with one leg up will guarantee you get the results you want.

2. The biiiiiiig stretch

Faking a big stretch in order to put your arm around your date at the movie theater is old news. Now we’re doing a big stretch just to show off the goods. Bonus points if your butt’s up in the air.

3. The belly up

It’s so cute when cats roll over on their backs, exposing their plush little bellies. So why wouldn’t it be cute when you expose your plush little belly?

4. The flop over on your side

This one is giving Cleopatra. It’s giving Roman goddess being fed peeled grapes. It’s a power move that says, “I don’t even need to try; you’ll come to me.”

5. The pounce out of nowhere

The pounce out of nowhere is definitely a pro move, so you should save this one until you have some experience with the other techniques. It basically works like this—you wait until your partner is under the covers about to fall asleep. Then you slowly, silently creep up on them until you’re within striking distance, and that’s when you go in for the kill. Or the seduction.

6. The naughty nibble

Admittedly, this might yield mixed results depending on your partner’s skin sensitivity. But if it works how it works for cats, then forcing your partner to pet you and then biting them viciously will only make them want to pet you more.

7. The lie down on top of them and purr

Possibly one of the most straightforward ways to express interest, try lying down right on top of them, making sure you’re comfortable—and don’t be shy about standing up on their stomach, turning around in a circle, and plopping back down! Purring is optional but encouraged.

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