Internet flirting 101: How to slide into the DMs

Do you know there are over 3 billion social media users worldwide? While it’s tempting to think all great romances start IRL, it’s becoming more obvious that social media is an acceptable way to jumpstart your love life. For those of you who don’t know, direct messages (DMs) are private messages that one social media user can send another. and if you’re trying to get your flirt on with someone on social media, the DMs might be the place to do it.

How do you get into those DMs without looking like a creep? We have a three-step process:

1. Start small (and subtle)

Sliding into the DMs works best when the person already knows you exist. So if you’re crushing on a complete stranger, start by “following” that person on your chosen social media platform. Once you’ve done that, “like” a few posts/pictures. When you “like” a picture, your crush gets a notification. If you do this a few times, you will be on your crush’s radar. Don’t just like a dozen pictures at once though. It’s a little intense for your crush to see that someone has liked a bunch pictures in 30 seconds.

2. Use your words

Once you’ve started liking pictures, you can up the ante by adding a comment. If your person has a gym picture (a.k.a. a thirst trap), you can compliment their form. If you’re feeling a little less aggressive, you can compliment something less eh…explicit. Maybe they posted a dope sunset or a clever meme. You can shower praise on it, and hopefully your would-be boo will respond.

3. Less compliments, more questions

So your crush has already noticed you in their mentions, and they’ve probably responded to your comments. Now, instead of throwing out a pick-up line, send a question via direct message. If bae has a million food pictures from a trip to New York City, ask about the pizza. The key is to start a private conversation, so stay away from yes or no questions. Open-ended questions give you (and your crush) more to work with.

Once you’ve started chatting, you’re just two regular people having a normal conversation the same way you would IRL. Take your chances, send cute emoji, and shoot your shot. The odds are in your favor.

Good luck,


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