11 things that are better than sex
You can do some of these things today
Yeah sex is great or whatever. But sometimes life brings a dry spell or a “not right now” phase. So we’re here to tell you that there are at least 11 things better than sex (and probably more than 11!). Here they are:
- Learning all the words to Castaways and singing it on repeat until your loved ones beg for mercy
- Having the whole row to yourself on a plane
- Not basing your sense of self-worth on whether someone else finds you attractive
- When the scissors do that gliding thing when you’re cutting wrapping paper
- Wearing whatever tf you want this summer
- Being vaccinated
- Taking a shower after not bathing for way too long
- The first bite of ice cream
- Hugging your friends for the first time in a year
- Eating food you didn’t have to make yourself
- Knowing you’ll retire someday
P.S. Bonus number 12: makeup that doesn’t melt off your face.
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