Look, maybe turkey is an aphrodisiac for you. Maybe it’s your only opportunity to get any action while staying with family because everyone passed out after dinner. Maybe you’re just looking for any excuse to take your pants off. We’re not going to try to guess why you might want some hot, hot Thanksgiving sex. We’re just going to help you make the most of it.

Halloween’s officially over, but if you’re not ready to let go of witch season in favor of Santa season just yet, we’ve got you. Here are some of our favorite ways to use leftover Halloween candy in the bedroom—and hey, you’ll get an extra hour in bed on Sunday, so why not make the most of it!

We understand. Some days you get home from work and all you want to do is curl up in the fetal position on the bare floor while someone feeds you soft crumbs of white bread like you’re a baby bird. We’re here to tell you it’s totally normal and not a problem at all for adults to feel like they’d rather be baby birds!

Seriously though, you don’t have to have sex. Not today, not tomorrow, not ever if you don’t want to. But in the event that you DO want to, but you don’t seem to be in the mood at the right times (for example, if you’re only in the mood during meetings), we’ve got some tried-and-true ways to get your body and brain back in alignment.

We’ve been pretty clear about how we feel about most New Year’s resolutions around here, but we do make an exception for resolutions that have to do with prioritizing your own pleasure. So here are our top 7 ways to have the best sex of your life in the new year.